Once your child becomes a teen, you start to see signs of independence that were not there before. They change beyond all recognition, seemingly before your eyes. Here are the top 5 mistakes dads make with their teens.
4 – Always Expecting The Worst
Teenagers are seen as people who get into a lot of trouble. If you have negative expectations for your teen, then they might always live up (or down) to these expectations. It has been noted in studies that teens take risks. You might remember back to the risks you took in your teenage years. But you’re here now. Don’t always expect the worst. This is one of the most common of the mistakes dads make with their teens.
3 – Mistakes Dads Make With Their Teens: Overthinking It
We’re all guilty of this at times. We read books, speak with other parents and try to analyse our teens behaviour. We overthink it, rather than trusting our gut. The individual experiences you and your teens have are different to the ones everyone else has. Listen to your teen more than you look for answers in a textbook from an author that has never met your teen. I’d recommend one book on the subject and one book only. How to Talk so Teens will Listen & Listen so Teens will Talk is a great book on the subject.
2 – Getting Discipline Wrong
There is a fine line to draw here. Too much discipline and they will feel like they are still a child. Too little and they will feel like they can do whatever they want. The line in the middle is the best one to tread. My advice here –
Do what you say you are going to do.
If you make promises or threats, then be 100% prepared to back it up with action. They need to develop their own skills and decision-making processes. Doing all of this for them can make your teen irresponsible. Not having any guidance will leave them out of control.
1 – Inappropriate Reactions
If you have been the parent of a teen for some time, then you will already know they feel you overreact to everything. Do you know what? In some instances, they are right. If you overreact at the small stuff, then it can be difficult to get an accurate reaction for something really important.
A quiet word does wonders. But if something needs correction, then don’t be afraid to o this, even if you fear a reaction from your teen. You ae on the same side and working together with this. But they need to know where the line is.